Review: Love Boldly: Embracing Your LGBTQ Loved Ones and Your Faith

 

 

Love Boldly: Embracing Your LGBTQ Loved Ones and Your Faith by Becky Mackintosh
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I really really enjoyed reading this book. The story of a mother, a family, and their son who came out as gay, who left the church, married his husband, and yet how this mother and father continue to embrace their son AND the church and their faith.

The biggest take-away for me was two-fold:
1- Christ asks us to love all people - and while there are different kinds and levels of love, when it comes to our FAMILY it is even more important to provide that pure love that only we, as parents, can provide. That doesn't necessarily mean (I am speaking from personal experience here, not the book's message) that the child will accept that love - sometimes the child has their own issues that perhaps impedes them from accepting that love - but not matter, we can still OFFER it.
2- We will never have ALL the answers to ALL of life's issues. We don't really know why or how people turn gay. And those things should not matter when it comes to loving our child/that other person/whomever that identifies as gay or any LGBTQ+. Christ simply says "I understand the details, I'm simply asking you to trust in me, I'll take care of the rest by the time it's all said and done."  So really it comes down to: Do I REALLY trust (have faith) in Christ? If I do, then I will find a way to continue loving this person, no matter what their life looks like.

The only issue this book DIDN'T answer for me, personally, was this: What if that child/other person is someone that you cannot trust, and someone who lives in such an opposite universe than you? Well, I've come to the conclusion that without trust, that honest communication, there can be no true relationship, because a true, deep, meaningful relationship MUST have trust at its foundation. But the other part, about them living in a opposite universe than you - I still haven't come to a solid conclusion - I think for now I've realized that we can still love that person, but that perhaps this love will not be the kind that includes a deep, trusting kind of relationship, but rather one that will need some boundaries. And I think that's ok too.

As I have a desire to be understanding, compassionate and Christlike, and above all else I have a desire to follow Christ and obey His commands, then obeying His 2nd greatest command of all (Love thy neighbor as thyself) is of greatest significance, and this book helped me understand even more so than before that I CAN do that even while not having ALL the answers and while not being able to understand ALL things. Each person wants to be loved above all things. Offering that love does not include things like agreeing in all areas, or enabling or being permissive - but it does include not judging wrongly and it does include leaving room to have SOME kind of relationship with that person and offering love, not criticism, not judgment, not correction, etc.

One other thing I really appreciated about this book - is the openness and honestly with which the parents shared their innermost questions, fears, apprehensions, thoughts and even prayers as they went through this experience. As a reader I felt I could really feel the stretch and pull of the growing that they had to go through - sometimes 'endure' - as they grew to become who they are today. Certainly this was not an easy trial to have their lives turned inside out, and head into a new direction - but they faced it with FAITH, and LOVE and they were MEEK : allowing themselves to be taught and guided by the Spirit. They never once questioned their FAITH in God and that was a big example to me. Instead of questioning their faith, which is what too many people turn to all too quickly these days, I think, they went to God and asked Him to TEACH THEM how to understand this, how to deal with this, how this all fit into His plan. That is a lesson I've learned in my own life, and one that I really appreciated them sharing in this book. I think it is a crucial lesson for any believer.... especially in today's Latter-days!

I would highly recommend this book for anyone 12+. Lots of good insights.

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